My business isn't going well. Even my tax accountant gave up on me. I've written about that before. So as a side gig, two years ago, I started a part-time cleaning job. Mid-fifties. However short-handed the times are, nobody's lining up to hire someone this age with zero experience. So I picked a site that said "beginners welcome." The company's short-handed and struggling, so even a beginner gets welcomed. But to the people actually working the site, nothing's harder to deal

In my thirties, I once walked the Shikoku pilgrimage. It started as a way to pray for my younger brother, who had died. On my own two feet, I traced the path Kūkai is said to have opened, making my way around all 88 sacred temples. Whether I was searching for something or just wanted to try it — back then, I couldn't have told you myself.。 Somewhere along the walk, honestly, I stopped thinking much about my brother. Before that, I'd been eaten up with regret, sure I could hav

Last week, on 8/12, I went from Tokyo to Niigata. A typhoon was approaching, and everywhere in Kanto was forecast rain over Obon. Niigata was clear. So I went with Niigata. That was the whole reason. The purpose was to "feel." That's all. Take the sea. Up till now, for me, a beach honestly wasn't a place to look at the sea itself. It was a place I looked at with an ulterior motive—maybe something will start, maybe I'll meet someone. Not that—just looking at the sea, as the se

There's someone I go out drinking with. An older guy, same sex as me.When a dish meant to be shared comes out, he eats almost all of it. Not a shred of consideration. Every time, it irritates me. Since I was small, I've had this tendency to live thinking I have to be a good person. So the unreasonable parts inside me, I put a lid on them myself. I couldn't see them. But one day, I realized it. Of course the other guy wasn't around—it was when I was drinking alone at the count

Thinking back, the things I wished for have actually come true more often than not. When I was young, I vaguely thought I wanted to become a company president someday.Decades later, I did. What I understood once I got there was that even if you land the title, that alone guarantees nothing. Before I knew it, I'd lost money. My companions drifted away too. On top of that, even my tax accountant left. "It was tough" doesn't come close to covering it. Back when I was vaguely wis

The first Resident Evil had a hidden feature: the infinite rocket launcher. Clear the game within three hours and you get a rocket launcher with unlimited ammo. But to meet that condition, I replayed the same game over and over. It's a time attack, so of course I did. Before I knew it, the enemy spawn points, the item locations, the way the story unfolded—all of it was in my head. It was a well-made enough game that you could lose yourself in it and forget reality. That's exa

Life has moments you think are good, and moments you think are hard. If there's someone out there who's walked a life where everything felt good, I can only think there's something wrong with them. So how do you live this life that swings up and down no matter what? The answer I've arrived at is dead simple. Become it fully, feel it fully, and act. That's all it takes. I'm starting to seriously believe this simple way of living might just be what "happiness" is. "Becoming it